Love Me, Not

~ Fuckingly NO LIFE~

Updates

Ok, finally i'm back here to update. Frankly, I had the time to post, in fact plenty, but somehow didn't have the right mood to do. Lotsa things have past, so i'll one by one, say it all, by photos!

Sick...~

Ambassadorial team's installation ceremony! Azlinah and me as the emcees, and that was the first time speaking to probably more than 500 seated guests and members, after a small x'mas party. Felt nervous, somehow a fresh experience, and a satisfied anticipation.

And from left: Nabil, Xing Xuan, me, and Rayson!

Exam, exam, exam. It isnt' all over but i'm quite sure they're over. Why? Sigh.. This picture was taken at a food court in Novena while reading up a marketing set of notes.

Next, it was Wendy's birthday and we celebrated it at sch mac. Lots of attention was on her when we sang her a song, and she blushed.

From here on, it's Chinese New Year! Mum had been busy with the preparation which I questioned her business because I thought why make a fuzz over this festival when it could have been made easier? Haha, anyway, my house has everything - Bakwa,peanuts, drinks, chewy candies, love letters, andMORE. And they're still here after CNY. I seriously don't know how to clear them off except to dispose, which I think it's so sayang!

Spring cleaning! Changing sofa covers, though not done by me, i felt the Cai Shen Ye is on his way to my house. But up till now he's not!

It's first day of CNY! Mum and sis dressed as though the 70s. So retro lah! New clothes, fresh feelings.

i've got absolutely no idea on why did I do this.

Grandpa's 90th birthday! Zhou Kitchen, a tong lok group of restaurants.

This pearl was found in an oyster!!!!!! HOW LUCKY!!!

My Sis, Me.

Went to pay respect to late granddad at a temple in Balestier road. Grandma prepared some food and made her signature rice cakes (in pink) for prayer. And noticed the family of three seated in front and an empty table? Everyone critisized them for their disrespect. I laughed at the mother.

At my grandma's place. After dinner, some of us chatted over the table and enjoyed occasional sip of lager beer, some red wine. Grandma cooked nice dinner. We played nice chest!

Went to nic's house in boon lay for a sumptous steamboat.

Played 'life'. I began my 'life' as 'one man with a car'. Subsequently i skipped education and head straight to workforce. Why? I wanted to test whether without studies how far and fast can I go, given some points in the 'map' will require 'degree cert'. Haha, I managed to skip every place that needed a degree. But I didn't win cos I reached the end slower.

I drive the green car!!!!

Along the way, I got the most money. more than a multi-millionaire. but... sadly, i didn't get a chance to marry a wife, and bear children. No children, no wife, no happiness.

On the fourth day of CNY, went to Mr ong's house. Snowy!!!

Basically that's all, just some photos to fill up the mouth.

Day, And Nite

Day and Night

It stalks the night

It stalks the day

It seeks out life

And whisks it away

It's known as death

And other things too

But it's all the same

What matters is you.

How do you see it?

What does it mean?

It's best if you know

For death is unseen.

It can take you at day

It can take you at night

Knowing death well

Can lend you some light

The passage to death

Is always unclear

And it's best to know

That you're very near.

For death is at hand

It is for us all

Know it's face well

So you don't stumble and fall

Now think hard on death

And know that it's near

And the meaning of life

Will be all to clear

And that is to live

For your hearts desire

Not to stumble or fall

But to burn with a fire.

A fire for life

To live for each day

To reach for your dreams

No matter what people say

Life is a question

And death holds a clue

Reach not for the answer

For your life's not due

Live for the moment

And die for it too

For it's the moment that counts

It, and you

Now I'm all done

I've said what I'll say

Just remember one thing

Live for the day!

Yours, Ah Meng

To my utmost condolences

Ms Ah Meng

Passed away peacefully on 8Feb2008

You were whom I had always thought 'Ah Meng' was the general description for your 'Orang Utan' species until today, till your death that I finally know your name 'Ah Meng' was actually the name of yours. I will never forget the sight of you peeling banana skins up on stage when I was only seven, when I visited the Zoo with my primary one classmates. With much laughters were merely due to your long and messy body hair that we then thought you probably have not washed yourself for as long as you lived. Rest well, in peace, Ah Meng.

Though you're, sadly, just another promotional material for the zoo.

Pre-Chinese New Year

It's chinese new year soon and i've just finished with my exams! Not all though, but technically yes. I'm so busy following my mum's footsteps in preparation of CNY just today. So I won't have time to blog now, except to put your indulgence right here with some photos.

Oh My, It's Photo Time!

Firstly, let me introduce to you two new additions to my family. One named Strider and the other, Striver. Both of them have the same characteristic of independence, and they are strong-willed, ambitious, and last but not least, contented.

Left: Strider; Right: Striver

So now you know what they are, uh-huh? They are actually called 'Air Plants' and are in the same family of pineapple breed. They do not require any soil, but simply water (basic) and sunlight. Moderate wind is a bonus. I bought them on 29th December 2007 at White Sands and they were babies. I named them Strider and Striver is because of their characteristics described above. Independence - Does not require soil; strong-willed - never say die even if not watered regularly; Ambitious - grow and grow and grow non stop, bear flower to look pretier; and contented - they wish only water and sunlight.

So for the 'grow and grow and grow' part, here's the progress of their growth:

Lo and behold - Strider now has more leafs, while striver is bearing flowers. (Photo taken on 10 Jan 08)

They're achivement oriented type so they wish to grow bigger and bigger. Here are the latest development. These photos are taken today, 6 February 2008.

Strider's photo was taken like 'satelitte in the space' to resemble its will to soar, like a real strider. (The earth was an illusion made by my carpet, and the black surface is my piano) Striver is of no different. Saw the two flower buds striver now honourarily holds? It's his/her pride. It's my passion.

And today, I have yet another few additions to my family of nature!

Left - Morning Glory; Right - Orchids! Notice the two purples on each side?

And it simply was a joke when heading home with the morning glory. It was however not much of a glory at that time though, not because it's at night but it's where it stood.

Exams, Mummy, & Apology

Hmm, time has past, things have changed. The supposedly-'B' modules now becomes a question of whether I can pass them. 2 out of 5 (Finance and EFMA). Then just today I went to submit MC for the Law paper, Martin lee told 'if you're eligible for the alternative paper, they'll inform you via phone call'. And that's another question mark. I'm damn uncertain now. Frustrated. And it got worse when i got one 15mins of sleep just to prepare EFMA last night, and all the more it gave me nightmare: i remembered every single thing clearly but once i entered the exam hall, totally became blank. BLANK. I did only few questions, and only few of the few i'm confident of getting them right. Do the math and you'll see. I just feel, at the moment, I'm in such a sorry state. Hope it'll be a better day for tomorrow, but nonetheless all will be left in memories as stories for grandsons as to why grandpa got blacked-out right before the most important exams. I feel shamed. The only hope i can rest upon is on Marketing.

Anyway, things have to move on. Last paper for tmr. And why i'm still here you may ask, instead of revision. I simply cant carry the load already. It's just too much!!

Next week is IPP week one. I was told of several things, in demand.

• One day of MC, one day of pay dock.
• Job scope: Marketing research
• Tools needed: Mouth, head, and physically a laptop (No PC there!)
• Free company transport
• Free company lunch (being a food company)

So the moment I heard of it - oh no.. how to carry a laptop without a bag. So I went Lenovo website and got myself a 'ThinkPad Carrying Case - Expander'. Not very cheap though.

MAMA

As long as we carried to your knee

The tales and treasures of eventful days,

Knowing no deed too humble for your praise,

Nor any gift too trivial to please.

So still we bring with older smiles and tears,

What gifts we may to claim the old, dear night;

Your faith beyond the silence and the night;

Your love still close and watching through the years.

What is love to me?

The Five Love Languages

My primary love languages are probably
Quality Time and Words of Affirmation.

Complete set of results

Quality Time:		9
Words of Affirmation:		9
Physical Touch:		8
Acts of Service:		2
Receiving Gifts:		2

Information

Unhappiness in relationships, according to Dr. Gary Chapman, is often due to the fact that we speak different love languages. Sometimes we don't understand our partner's requirements, or even our own. We all have a "love tank" that needs to be filled in order for us to express love to others, but there are different means by which our tank can be filled, and there are different ways that we can express love to others.

Take the quiz

Within the day...

First thing first - Just decided to switch back to use the normal font size instead. Their big brothers are just too big; i almost thought i've entered into the Enid Blyton's world of stories for the little minors. But colours remain unchange, as according to my mood of the day.

And today it's black once again. Guess what? I'd prepared so well for law exam that I posted 'A is for apple, but this time, it's for law'. I felt so confident until last night when I can't remember a single thing. Yes, even a simple definition for 'common law'. I went to school, was hoping to shake up my brains and enter the hall with a smile. I couldnt, demolished all anticipated hopes and left. Took an MC instead, so will be eligible to take the retest paper soon, i hope. Clement was like 'what the? it was damn easy lah', and pascale too, just realised my absence after i told her. Their responds were same, not just similar, so i suppose it was really easy. No regrets though, no matter how easy the paper was I still don't think i can pass, given that wrong state of mind at 2.40pm (2.50pm paper). According to Sun-Tzu, his law states that if you feel weak even before the war, you better not fight cos you're very likely to lose. You've left the chance to win, but at the same time, you've left the chance of dying. I think, i was simply too complacent in question. And I realise whenever I feel that way, my nerves would be blocked. Thoughts overpowered my actions, and that's a gone case.

Anyway, went to work straight after the doctor's visit. Work was fun! But was somehow was remanded by chief I was away from the kitchen when he needed help. After everything's been moved, he saw me outside beside the van and said: 'hey you are outside! inside alot things must move u know and you are here. wa like that part time very ho tan hor? So easy.' Quite sarcastic la. ok so after that, went to the venue for catering. *posh i would describe, and heard from weida (from hazlan) they spent 3million not rupiah but sing dollars on renovation alone. and it indeed seemed to have worthed such an amount. Took only one photo as I tried to be permitted to do so. After that I was asked to go back to the restaurant cos overstaffing there. At the restaurant it wasn't that free also, about 70 pax everybody eat the same thing. I literally locomoted like an ant. No, a bunch of ants. Cos it's teamwork, haha! Eh laugh leh... Ok nvm. Anyway, there was this group of people, unsure of what they're up to, who kept wanting to take group photos with me. Asked for my name, followed by age, then school. Then!! while i was busy in the kitchen, they sent someone into the kitchen and looked for me. Grr i was a little fearful then, while nonetheless dragging my feet along. They actually wanted my number. So weird la. They are in a group of some age about 30s some 20s. Surely over their 20s i'm completely sure. 4 women and a guy. Probably some job or wadever opportunities are awaiting, so i handed them my namecard. yes namecard! it was the first time in my life i handed to strangers a namecard called mine. Anyway it's printed with an NYP logo on it cos i got it as an ambassador of NYP.

Look! the Bentley super-long limousine. Owned by Michael Ma, one of Singapore's veterans for wine-and-dine industry. Relatively, it is almost double the length of a Vios (Middle, blue car). (Though Vios looked longer here - perspective wise) I wonder how does it perform a U-Turn.

This model building was in the 'posh' venue i've described. Managed to only take one photo, the precious one. Noticed the reflected 'stone' wall, it is part of the S$3m renovation thingy.

My dinner: Milk pudding with cocktail fruits and strawberry syrup.

My dinner part 2: Churasco (Clockwise from top: Basil leave chicken tigh my fav, Bratwurst pork; Chicken hearts also my fav, spiced pork ribs) There were beef ribs, cod fish, beef slices, pork ham, and lamb shoulder as well, but i was contented with just these friends! Noticed the amount? I took them all home. I've got company for lunch tmr!

For more photos and stuff of another catering event on the same day, go to weida's blog for the same-date entry =) I think he ate much more than I did last night. Lol. My eyes turned green.

Ok, that's all for today folks, not even to mention the thrill ride home. It was just too scary to even recall. HAHA (Refer to my 'mindmap' below if u're interested)

Go home -> Took serene's hubby car -> Small daewoo -> reckless driver -> small car i so scared it overturn -> 80kph at corner -> tailgate -> ppl stress, ppl siam -> until this taxi don siam -> tailgate -> and tailgate. Highbeam -> Taxi don care -> Continue fight -> whole PIE, BKE, and then KJE-> both vehicles switched lanes to 'fight' -> at 120kph -> it was nighttime, dark, my mind was 200%, bright -> middle-finger style signals (new) -> seat belts were off, ready for confrontation i suppose -> purposely brake and go, three times -> i was at back seat -> end, i nearly reached, not home but heaven. -> so you are reading this story you should know i'm safe. back home. phew~

The moral of the story: Never hitchhike. For a safe ride.

I couldn't sleep for the entire night, the images just flashed through my mind. Yes, it was that bad, plainly too scary. I simply, the least, hope it will not affect my driving lesson. And I rather, at any circumstance, fork out cash from my pocket and hail a cab. No matter what amount, i'm willing for my life.